Wrecked ---> Restored

DISCLAIMER: this post is not to be read by anyone who isn't sitting in a fanfrickintastic spinny chair. you just couldn't handle it. you have been warned.


we've all been told before [directly/indirectly] to just "follow your heart".. whether it's by hearing the phrase gently woven into the lyrics of a song, boldly scrawled over a t-shirt, stamped on a bracelet, or spoken out of someone's mouth as we asked them for advice about a problem, most likely closely related to our emotions. the world hands out this suggestion like it's the best solution out there, but have you ever thought about what it actually means.. about how utterly stupid and mind-numbingly unintelligent it is?


[Jeremiah 17:9
the heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?]


so, just think about that for a minute... deceitful above all things? desperately wicked?
why, again, should we be following our hearts? 


*insert noises mocking people's brain functioning level here*


[Matthew 15:18-19
those things which proceed out of the mouth come forth from the heart; and they defile the man. for out of the heart proceed evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications, thefts, false witness, and blasphemies.]


it's pretty apparent, from the Bible and from our own lives, that our hearts are vile & wicked.. again, I ask, why should we be letting it purposely direct us? what is there to gain?


I'm not implying we should ignore our emotions, and completely disregard our desires; those things certainly have a place in our lives.. we just shouldn't let them rule us. we should not be subject to our emotions, and we should not let how we feel dictate what we do. that is such a cheap and weak approach to anything in life, and it won't do us any good.. we'll all have the joy of finding that out sooner or later.


also, if we "listen to our heart" [another senseless, cliche line that makes me twitch], just what kind of answer are we expecting to get? besides for, hopefully, a steadily pulsing heartbeat, we're not going to find anything.. let alone the right answer, or the one we should be looking for, I assure you. the correct response to any question we have cannot be found within our hearts.


[Proverb 28:26
he that trusteth in his own heart is a fool: but whoso walketh wisely, he shall be delivered.]


[James 1:5
if any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.]


I don't want to get too off subject here, but let's just follow where these verses take us for a minute...


[Ephesians 5:15-16

see then that ye walk circumspectly [[watchful, discreet, cautious, prudent; well-considered]], not as fools, but as wise, redeeming the time, because the days are evil.]

[Colossians 4:5a

walk in wisdom toward them that are without, redeeming the time..]

there is an obvious theme here in the verses: walking wisely..
and I could completely go on & make this last forever, but you get the point, so I'll end it now with my main thought: is it really wise to follow your heart, afterall? just take some time to think about what it is that people are actually saying, and, consequently, what it is you're listening to and potentially following after. I think we would be shocked if we realized how comfortable we've become with having such vapid advice from the world shoved down our throats; I doubt we even realize it half the time. being aware though can save us from feeling like we're doing the right thing, when we actually may be making a really stupid decision. we are to redeem [[purchase, buy back; to recover]] the time, not waste it by following the desires of our selfish heart. our time/our life is but a second in the vast scheme of things [James 4:14/Psalm 144:4/Isaiah 2:22] and with what little of it we do have, we should endevour to make the most of every opportunity, and live for something greater than ourselves. we can rescue the time we are constantly losing, and use it for something so much better than what the world would have us do.. 


[Romans 12:2
and be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.]


[Hebrews 12:1-3
wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us, looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God. for consider him that endured such contradiction of sinners against himself, lest ye be wearied and faint in your minds.]


[Proverbs 14:12, 3:5-6
there is a way which seemeth right unto a man, but the end thereof are the ways of death. trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. in all thy ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct thy paths.]


okay, two last verses (:


[Psalm 51:10

create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.]


[Proverbs 4:23
above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.]

TwoThousandEleven [resolutions & salvation]

go ahead and make your vows; scratched out words & blurry lines match your attempts at self-denial. you're no better than the rest. & while you hide your shame behind the distant second chance, pray tomorrow comes.. this time you will outlast the three days..... & after 6hrs of writing your heart out, face it.. what is it worth? for all it matters, nothing of this kind does. so turn around & face the world, you're gonna fall, so why waste life pretending you can be perfect? acceptance of this is the closest you will come. 12:01am. why believe in it? what's another 24hrs of winter spent with your vile attempts. bruising. lacerating. diminishing. shattering. stop the slavery; the miserable toil. the moments find you moving backwards, waiting for nothing more than the curtains to drop around your unpure sacrifice. & if my heart stops beating before I learn this, promise me you'll pack my memories in it & keep it safe- I want to know all the love I've got. for what's your purpose, if not to find love? why are you struggling? why are you trying to prove that you can be more than what you are? it's found not in the labor. not in the fruitless attempts. nor in the shedding of guilty tears, but in the sound of forgiveness. in the presence of acceptance. in the flow of His blood. [[and if we get beaten by this winter, if we get strangled by regret, just let our love of life and tension gasp in sweet and stuttered breaths, and
have them lay us in a basement, smash some bottles on the ground, and say we never knew the difference between the feeling and the sound]] may we be ever grateful that, in our sinful prayers, He perfects every word. He knows your needs. He knows your faults. & He loves you. why are you still searching? ...let Him be enough. 
He is so much more than enough <3  

The Ground Still Beneath My Feet..

It's true: our lives are what we make it. we have the choice to grant ourselves knowledge, and we have been given the brain-capacity that leaves us with no excuse for making intentionally stupid choices. however, one cannot deny that we are influenced, most certainly to varying degrees, by those around us. every moment of each day that we spend with others, finds our thoughts, emotions, ideals, standards, and the such, infiltrated, pushed around, broken, changed, renewed, etc.. these changes can be positive, negative, or, simply, just different. of course, this is nothing new.. we all should have a grasp of this common truth. but for me, the whole concept hits pretty close to home right now. no matter who you are, no matter what you do; someone is always watching. and they are listening. and potentially following in your lead. yes, they are responsible for their own choices, but, as a Christian, we are commanded not to be a stumbling block, and we are responsible for being a good witness. this doesn't mean being fake and pretending that we are perfect and got it all together.. if that were true, then why would we need Christ? He is the power we need to be able to change. He is what we need in order to be that positive influence in someones life. it could be a stranger, a friend, an unsaved grandparent, or your lil brother or sister that is searching for direction, and maybe, unknown by you, they are looking to you for guidance. it could be as commonplace as your sibling being a jerk, and you wanting to be a butthole right back to them.. or it might be you getting into a heated discussion with someone about your beliefs and they belittle you, while throwing all your words and reasons back in your face. two situations, two possible reactions; positive or negative. duhh, it feels like crap when someone is a jerk to you, and, yeah, it might feel even worse at that moment to be nice to them.. but what's the right thing? what action will help you best show the love of Jesus? just knowing the right answer isn't the solution; we often know the right thing but still don't do it. for me, keeping the fact in mind that I really -can- help make the difference in someones life, encourages me to choose & take action on what i know to be right. they are in control of their actions, and we are of ours, just as much. so, in conclusion to this big fat pile of thoughts: everyone influences everyone. just make sure yours is a positive one(: you might help save a life.