MeYouAndEveryoneWeKnow

it's happening again, I can see what you do to me; always different but the same.. I won't let you take, won't let you make what I refuse to give [is everything I hold at stake], ready to lose it all, just show me a worthy cause.. I'm not sure of anything, knowing it could never be your face again that lights up my world, pull it all tightly shut, I'm opening up the door, closing my heart, won't go where we've gone before.. your name means more than three letters; solitary, binding it all in one stupid, conscious effort not to break down.. truth, resistance: what do you want from me? I'm trying too hard, not trying enough.. words were tainted, love was one of them.. but you don't scare me anymore, I won't be who I was, won't show that I'm weak enough to bleed, send me on my way is how it goes [on my wrist], even the perfect shatter their best.. no one deserves this thing called true love, yet we all need it so desperately. where can truth be found, if not in You? I've convinced myself the search is worth making me blind to all the things that don't exist, love substituted as bliss is overrated.. failure to commit, unwrapping the gift, he left me in pain rediscovering my meaning of sin, I don't understand.. two on one side, one on the other; two my enemy, one my brother.. who will I trust, what will I become? each season has its story, screaming the hatred from every mistake that's torn me into pieces.. am I finally believing.. it's not worth the life you give away just to make your heart feel wanted; your touch something so special.. the endless circles/the predator/the Saviour.... make it, bind me, heal the path to the Only Righteous, I desire Your truth [is sickening], more than I can take.. would You still love me, would You still die for me, would You still kiss my sins away, hold me 'til I swore you were a part of my very soul, never letting me go, promising me an escape.. I miss you quite terribly. I want the real thing [it's all You wanna give me], I can't believe you even want to look at me, I'm starting to think there's more than all I've been given, what I've been looking for can only be found when I come to the place where I believe with my entire self that You can erase it all.. abandon the imitation, the need to know I'm beautiful.. the answer is only found in You.. let me know You still want to be the One Thing in my life I treasure above worth.. my worth; show me it's You. I'm not misplaced, I'm right where You want me, right where I've gotta be to see You're all I need.. make me want You above everything, consume me, show me I can be so much more than what I thought, what everyone sees.. make me new, rewrite my heart in truth. my regrets are more than I can take, but I know You took it all.. You loved me through my betrayal, my renouncement of what I knew to be right in Your eyes.. I am not worthy, but because of You, I am.. I can be. I am, I will be. why would You love someone like me? because You made me Your own...


[[It's not the long walk home that will change this heart, but the welcome I receive at the restart." -Mumford&Sons]]